Down the rabbit hole

I am 'actualising' a book. And the process overwhelms me.

Talk about searching for ideas. It's like 'tumbling down a rabbit hole'. You loose track of time and distance...and then you loose the sense of falling until you fall into an alley of doors. Most often, you open any and you return how you went in. But sometimes, some doors take you to the wonderland, a place obvious with non-sense. You roam there in awe and wonder for what seems to be forever. And just when you feel like going back home, a deluge of ideas hit hard at you. You wake up with a pen in one hand and a notepad in another. Excitedly, hurriedly, you try to jot down as many as you can. And then, when all the ideas have gone and mind is apparently empty, a sense of peace prevails.

The process of 'actualising' this book makes me encounter outlandish feelings, bizarre experiences and a horde of troubling questions. It is for this reason I wanted to share this feeling with you. It's much too intense for me to handle alone.